Okay, let’s be very clear. I am losing my mind already and it’s been a week. Mostly because I have zero “stay at home mom” skills. I had exactly 12 days off from the day my children were born until the day I hobbled back to work. I am self-employed – zero maternity leave – and having twins, I really couldn’t afford to allow my business to suffer any more. I had been on bedrest for months. It was imperative that I go back to work. So, I hit the road 3 days a week, and hauled my babies around if I had to leave home the other 2 days a week. It was tough. But it was survival.
Now, ten years later, I am a stay at home mom by self-isolation. No, I am not sick. No, I have not been around anyone who is sick. Yes, I am still seeing some clients (super-screened) and I am still getting to my office (which is basically self-isolation in a second location) as much as I can. But I am also spending an extreme amount of time at home alone with my kids. So are many, if not all, of you.
What can I do?
I have been spending hours taking notes on what my expertise, what my business can do, to help you during this time. Well, if you read my posts on social media, if you read my blogs, the one thing I try to do is be real and funny. So, let’s be real. We are all trapped at home with the people we love. After this is over, we still want to love them. We need a break. Quiet time. A holy minute all ALONE.
I strongly believe that people need their own spaces. Adults and children alike, need spaces to feel good and safe in. When I was a child, my best friend’s parents built her a closet under the stairs. Not kidding. It was AMAZING!! We used to go in there and do all kinds of crafts and write songs and be silly. It was a small space, but all her stuff was perfectly organized in there, and it was like a fort, or a hideout in the house. Let’s use this as a lesson. We each need our own space.
Here is how:
- Start with choosing a spot for each member of your family. Be creative. It could be a spot by a window, a section of your kitchen counter, a corner on a floor, a spot in the hall. Whatever your space, designate a small area per person.
- Make it cozy. Pad the floor with pillows and blankets. Move a comfy chair to the spot. Pile up books you still want to read, your music, a special snack, crafts, a yoga mat, a thermos (mine will be filled with coffee during the day, wine at night 😊), maybe a candle in a jar, a manicure kit, etc. There are so many things you can put in your space. And you can change the items whenever you like.
- Have your family members participate in building their own cozy spot. Have the kids make a list of items they want there and suggest a few each day.
- Designate cozy nook time. Put it into your schedule. Maybe let everyone know that if they need alone time, this is their personal spot.
- Unlike the above, you can also create a cozy nook for reading time or fun time with your kids. Maybe a window seat, or another spot that can be designated for quiet family moments.
There are no rules, except that when you are in your cozy spot, at the designated cozy spot time, or if you really need a time out, no one can approach you unless it really is time to come back to communal space or they are bleeding or the house is on fire.
I am always here for a bit of advice, a laugh or to simply listen. Email me anytime for your design questions, or if you need any help. Together we will survive.
Have a terrific day,